Welcome to the “bubble.” The place where nothing else exists except the present moment. The place where you feel connected to yourself and the people and the spaces around you. You are happy, healthy and joyful. You feel care for, loved and at peace. You are content, at ease and completely in flow. You are in your happy place.
This bubble often happens when you go away, take vacation, unplug, or take a respite from the busy world that is your everyday life.
So, what actually IS it that changes in us? Does the bubble allow us to suspend reality? What is it about letting go for a while that allows us to breathe deeply and put life on hold for a bit? And what makes the transition back so darn hard?
Does “Reality” Burst Your Bubble?
Recently, I came back from an amazing beach trip that had me fully immersed in my bubble. I resolved to keep my bubble intact for as long as possible. I tried really hard not to let the stuff that I thought I should be doing…mail, bills, laundry, emails, work, my yard… overwhelm me.
But eventually it did. “Real life” started to poke holes in my bubble and pretty quickly it burst. Sound familiar? This is when you resign yourself to thinking that this is the way life is. After all, you can’t stay in the bubble all the time… or can you??
Can You Live In The Bubble?
Is it possible to create a life in which you can feel present, happy, cared for, loved, content and accepted all the time? Can you learn how to harness the shifting energy that transitions create? The answer is yes!
It’s about designing your life in a way that doesn’t require you to take a vacation from it! Yes, it’s true, you can live in vacation mode all of the time. It just calls for you to build awareness, make some shifts in your behaviors and practice, practice, practice. Here are three things you can focus on to help you keep yourself in your happy place.
Keep yourself grounded. Staying in the present moment is what will make you happy and feel cared for. Ask yourself, what do I need right now? Then focus on doing what feels good and what resonates with you.
Be aware of the word “should.” Notice when you start to focus on all the “stuff” and bring yourself back just being where you are. Then think about what you can delegate or let go of.
Do something for yourself—even if you don’t think you have time. I am not talking about carving out an hour or even 30 minutes. Just take a moment to do something for yourself. Put yourself in timeout for a few minutes. Sit in silence. Lay on the ground and look at the sky. Go for a walk around the block. Put on your favorite song and dance like no one is watching. This is you hitting the reset button.
Adjust Your Expectations
Do you have high expectations for yourself that are actually making you miserable? Be gentle with yourself. All of the things that poke at your bubble are external. They are real, but if you lower your expectations, they suddenly lose their power. Ask yourself what you are afraid is going to happen. Then reflect on whether it’s true or not. Most of the time it’s not true. It is simply a story you are making up. And if it is true, you are most likely thinking about the worst-case scenario.
Your expectations are internal. They are tied to fear and you have control over them. Why do you think certain things HAVE to happen? What is it connected to—your value, your worth, external validation? When you are worrying about disappointing people, ask yourself who will really be disappointed. Mostly likely it’s YOU judging yourself.
Reflect on bubble experiences
Reflection keeps you in your joy, rumination and judgment don’t. So often, you look back on your experiences and judge yourself for your behaviors (I shouldn’t have stayed up so late, had that second glass of wine, spent so much money, etc.).
Reflection on the other hand is about noticing and getting curious about your experiences. What about unplugging was so rejuvenating? What did you like best about this experience? In what ways did you show up that felt really authentic? How could you have shown up differently? Reflecting on your bubble experiences allows you to connect with your inner authority, which is the part of you that already knows how to be!
You have the power to retrain your brain and expand your bubble to encompass your life so that everyday feels like vacation. It doesn’t mean you are sitting on the beach all the time. It means you can bring the feelings of connectedness, joy, and peace to whatever you are doing or Being each day. Learn to seek out and create more bubble moments. Then savor them, look forward to them, learn from them and honor them so you can live the life you want.